happy birthday to me

I am 19 years old today.

Think of all the breaths I have breathed and candles I have blown out, and people I have met and tears that I have cried. Would anyone ever have a baby if they really thought about all the hurt, and all the love, and all the pain, and all the sorrow, and all the joy, and all the delight that one person could experience, in the short/long span of just 19 years?

I think it's going to be the best year yet. 
I really do. 
And I'm going to share a secret with you. 

I want to make music.
I want to sing. 
I want to write. 

And I don't know how, and I don't know why. But it's what I want. And need. And this year I am going to claim it. I'll let you know how it works out. There is so much to do.

I want to think
again of dangerous
and noble things.
I want to be light 
and frolicsome
I want to be 
improbable beautiful
and afraid of 
as though I had 
-Mary Oliver